Smile Train and the Complexity of Three
- July 29th, 2008 11:59 am
A copy of Better Homes and Gardens was left open in our house the other day. It was stopped on an ad for Smile Train, a charity that helps children with cleft palate and lips. There are at least a dozen photos of babies with cleft lips and palates on the page along with details of the Charity. Immediately, Allie seized the magazine.
At first, she was puzzled.
‘What’s wrong with their faces? Why do they have boo-boo’s,’ she asked, worried.
As I slowly explained it to her, her eyes became rimmed with tears, and she automatically began searching her mind for solutions. ‘Who will help them? They need a doctor,’ she assessed. I explained that that was what the ad represented. A charity that wanted to help these babies.
She cradled the magazine in her arms with the photos staring up at her, and talked about how she wanted to hold the babies, kiss them, and make them better, still heartbroken from the fact that they suffer.
When she went to sleep that night, she took the magazine with her. ‘Why are you sleeping with that,’ I asked, because I only thought pubescent boys slept with magazines. (And I won’t bother to mention my intense fear of paper cuts, because I can only imagine how many one might get if they slept with a magazine.)
‘I don’t want them to be lonely and sad,’ she replied in an air that made it seem as if I had asked the dumbest and most uncaring questions she had ever heard. Allie then curled up around the photos of the babies, placing her tiny hand on the page, and eventually went to sleep with them.
In short, that is the beauty and complexity of both Allie and the age three.
At three, she is more compassionate than most adults I know. She is concerned when she sees someone hurting. She cries sometimes for babies on television that are clearly undergoing treatments or having difficulties. Her tender heart is worn on her sleeve adjacent to the Little Mermaid emblem covering the front of her tiny t-shirt.
Most of the time, I want to cradle this girl in my arms the way she allowed me to do when she was an infant.But now, my allotted cradling time is whittled down to a series of seconds before she has to run off, because one of her Barbies is having a ‘mergency’ or because she’s ‘not a baby’.
In the midst of it all, hissy fit throwing aside, I thought it would help the world if more of us had the compassion of a three year old, if we were all genuine and whole with goodhearted intentions. Now, that would be fabulous.
(Allie while jumping on the bed the other day)
In the future, we’ll be donating to Smile Train. That’s for sure.
July 29th, 2008 @ 12:12 pm
What a good heart she has. And good for you for encouraging it.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 12:32 pm
in from twitter….
OH MY CRAZY! Great pic of your daughter. Like award winning!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 12:35 pm
Isn’t three wild and crazy and awesome and fun? (Not to mention exhausting and emotional and trying!?) Your daughter has a good heart, like my own 3 year old does.
Always wanting to help and make others feel better.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 12:39 pm
Awww, what a sweet little girl! And yes, the world would be a better place if everyone had the compassion of a three year old.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 12:48 pm
Children have the ability to see the inherent good in everyone and they aren’t bothered by stereotypes or preconceptions. There are times when I think the world would be a lot better off if run by kids.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 12:48 pm
That is too sweet… I hope she always has that compassion for others…
Thanks for sharing..
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July 29th, 2008 @ 12:48 pm
I just love hearing stories like that!!
I remember when my kids were young and they would express such compassion and kindness that it would make me proud and teary and amazed all at once…
Give that sweet little girl a snuggle!!
Jackie
PS – and tell her never stop loving jumping on beds or doing other things that make her happy… just look at that face!! That is the
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July 29th, 2008 @ 12:49 pm
continued…
happiest face EVER!!!
Jackies last blog post..Blinded by the Light, Revved Up Like a…
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July 29th, 2008 @ 12:52 pm
she is all heart. pure heart. i love it!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 1:01 pm
Doesn’t it make you feel like you’re doing something right?!?!?!
Very sweet!!!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 1:02 pm
That is the sweetest thing I’ve heard in a long time. What a kid!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 1:02 pm
The world needs more like Allie and more good mom’s like you to encourage them. That’s the first sign of real hope I’ve seen all morning.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 1:06 pm
I actually do know how to punctuate properly, I promise. “Good moms” is really what I was aiming to type, but I thought the apostrophe would add some character. Or something.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 1:17 pm
Sweet, sweet girl. I want to hug her.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 1:19 pm
I think it’s a fab idea to let her save money to donate! She is so so sweet!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 1:23 pm
It looks like she is already on board the smile train.
Who knows? Maybe in a few years, she will still want to help those lonely and sad children. You might have a future plastic surgeon on your hands.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 1:40 pm
My run-ins with cleft palates and my own three-year-old have not been so successful.
That’s a remarkable soul you’re raising, there. Wow.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 1:42 pm
What a sweet heart!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 2:10 pm
My three-old-year has a big heart, but he doesn’t think THAT much about the plight of others. You should be very proud, as I can see you are.
We’ve given to Smile Train once before, but I haven’t this year. Thanks for kicking my butt back in line.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 2:12 pm
Oh, and I love that pic. Nothing warms my heart like a curley cue redhead.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 2:38 pm
That’s just beautiful. She’s also lucky to have a Mom who recognizes the gift that her compassion is. My daughter, Melody, was born with a minor condition similar to a cleft palate which may or may not require surgery later in life, so your post caught me in the gut even more than usual.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 2:40 pm
Wow, what a sweet, beautiful girl you have there!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 3:01 pm
That is the sweetest thing ever.
I wish everyone were that caring.
LOVE the picture!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 3:10 pm
And then we grow up and get cynical and jaded…sad, huh?
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July 29th, 2008 @ 3:48 pm
How sweet!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 3:56 pm
What a sweet girl – you’re so blessed! I seemed to have ended up with one as selfish and greedy as I am! Shoot!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 3:59 pm
I certaninly hope you send this post to Smile Train. I am certain it would warm their heart as it has mine.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 4:26 pm
I love this post and that PHOTO! Oh my. The cuteness is blinding.
I don’t know what causes us to lose that compassion as we age and to become jaded. It’s sad, really.
I will check out that charity, too.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 4:37 pm
She has the sweetest little heart. Smile Train is one of my favorite charities too.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 4:44 pm
Thank you so much. I love the photo even though her eyes are closed.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 4:49 pm
That’s a great idea. I think I’ll forward the link to them.
-Thank you,
Amanda
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July 29th, 2008 @ 5:03 pm
I agree. If there were more people in the world like your daughter as a three year old maybe foundations like Smile Train wouldn’t have to spend so much on advertising and such. Your daughter is a great little person, you should be very proud.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 5:13 pm
I’ll start off with saying how clearly wonderful your daughter is so I don’t seem so self absorbed when I say this:
WHAT THE HELL! Your not supposed to go killing my dreams of my little girl staying cute and little and innocent and full of cuddles for the rest of her life. Here you are telling me how she, if raised right may grow up and have compassion and feelings other than hungry or tired and most importantly NOT WANT CUDDLES! You’re breaking my heart here!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 5:28 pm
lovely. ’nuff said.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 5:58 pm
That, is totally sweet!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 6:17 pm
How sweet!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 7:22 pm
What a great kid. You guys have done a fabulous job!
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July 29th, 2008 @ 8:04 pm
Big hugs to both of you guys. Her, because of the way she is and you, because I strongly suspect she’s learning much of this from her Mommy.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 8:24 pm
I love her. I want to give her a big hug and tell her that everything will be alright, and be able to deliver on that promise. What a sweet, dear heart she has.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 8:51 pm
If healing all of life’s boo-boos were that easy.
Here’s to your girl trying to help.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 8:53 pm
Wow, what a heart she has.
Love the picture.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 9:39 pm
Stab.
In.
My.
Heart.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 10:03 pm
amazing that a 3 year old can feel that much compassion and concern. she’s adorable.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 11:15 pm
How sweet. My boys and I have done simple projects for grandmothers etc to earn money to give away. They really like it.
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July 29th, 2008 @ 11:53 pm
That’s beautiful. Thanks for sharing. My 3yo is to busy making me crazy to do anything adorable.
Oh, wait… she does adorable stuff and that’s why she hasn’t been given for adoption….. YET! (I kid… sort of.)
I agree that the Smile Train is a wonderful charity to support.
Cheers!
Jamie
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July 30th, 2008 @ 4:01 am
Aw Amanda your blog always makes me feel better. You either make me lmao or inspire me in one way or another. What a little angel. Made me tear up that she took them to bed with her.
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July 30th, 2008 @ 5:59 am
aw, that’s so sweet. what a way to make a mama proud!
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July 30th, 2008 @ 6:43 am
That is so sweet. It’s great that shw’s getting such an awareness of others at that young age.
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July 30th, 2008 @ 8:45 am
I’m so proud of your baby girl…
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July 30th, 2008 @ 8:51 am
What a beautiful little girl! I hope that she is always free to love and be sweet.
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July 30th, 2008 @ 9:33 am
Hi Amanda and Allie from Smile Train,
What a great story – thank you for writing about your wonderful daughter Allie. It sounds like she is already on her way to being a great humanitarian.
Her story and compassion is really an inspiration to us in the office at Smile Train, and makes us work harder. Allie’s smiling face inspires other to help give these poor children all over the world smiling faces too!
Currently we have helped over 330,000 children since 1999, doing about 300 surgeries a day in 75 developing nations. If you need anything from us (or if we can send Allie a t-shirt or bear)…please dont hesitate to contact me at:
Alex Judd
Donor Relations Associate
ajudd@smiletrain.org
877.543.7645
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July 30th, 2008 @ 9:46 am
Awww.. your three year old made me cry! I want to support Smile Train too!!!! Thanks for the info!
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July 30th, 2008 @ 10:06 am
It’s amazing what children can teach us.
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July 30th, 2008 @ 10:45 am
This actually made me cry. You’re very right. Your little girl has more compassion than most adults I know as well! You should be so proud! I think it’s amazing…and who knows….maybe you have a future doctor or humanitarian on your hands! *applause*
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July 30th, 2008 @ 10:59 am
great post!!
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July 30th, 2008 @ 11:53 am
We should all have the same compassion that three year olds have. It really is sad that we don’t.
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July 30th, 2008 @ 12:01 pm
You are raising her right.
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July 30th, 2008 @ 12:11 pm
Thank you.
I’m certainly trying.
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July 30th, 2008 @ 12:18 pm
testing 1-2.. testing 1-2
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July 30th, 2008 @ 1:02 pm
wow, should I have read that next week when I am, y’know, undergoing that womanly time, I would be a trainwreck of tears and have Mr.T on the phone seeing if we can switch our United Way *ahemMEGAahem* donation to go to The Smile Train instead of Cancer Research. Oh, what the hell…let the tears flow and the phone ring in my husbands office!!
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July 30th, 2008 @ 2:20 pm
That’s one tender-hearted little girl you’ve got there!
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July 30th, 2008 @ 2:26 pm
What a wonderful story. Thank you for sharing. My nephew just recently went through surgery to repair a cleft lip, compassion is key…for children and their families. Thanks!
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July 30th, 2008 @ 3:15 pm
What a great story! She is so sweet…
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July 30th, 2008 @ 3:37 pm
What a sweetheart!!!
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July 30th, 2008 @ 5:04 pm
So sweet:)
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July 30th, 2008 @ 6:07 pm
so sweet!
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July 30th, 2008 @ 6:46 pm
what an incredibly sensitive and sweet girl. Awh, I want to squeeze her!
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July 30th, 2008 @ 7:37 pm
Sweet little kid. I find myself emulating my three year old more and more often.
Wish we could all have sweet little people in our lives to pattern after.
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July 30th, 2008 @ 8:24 pm
I LOVE that your daughter is showing how sensitive and caring she is about others. No “mean girl” there!
xoxoxox
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July 30th, 2008 @ 9:58 pm
Beautiful post. Very eloquent. I hope that her innocence and compashion isn’t bought out by rampant advertizing of the other kind. Your daughter sounds like a sweetheart of a girl and I doubt that her tender heart will change much over time. Way to go mamma!
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July 30th, 2008 @ 9:59 pm
opps. can’t spell to well today… sorry ’bout the typos…
K
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July 31st, 2008 @ 7:52 pm
There is nothing like a 3 year old! I’m glad that I have one in my house that is for darn sure! Savannah teaches me something new every day, and gives me constant entertainment. It is amazing how much that comprehend at such a young age.
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August 7th, 2008 @ 4:07 pm
That’s precious! And very true. I love how sweet 3 year olds are. And my girl ‘is not a baby’, so I pretty much have to hold her down to cuddle/rock her. One day she will be way too big for that! ack!!
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