The Snot Mustache:First Day of School
- September 9th, 2008 3:24 pm
I meant to write about Allie’s first day of school yesterday. However, I got caught up writing hateful letters to Little Debbie, and I thought it a strong possibility that the internet had already milked the first day of school bit to death. I will, for your sake, attempt to take a different approach. I think there are only so many times you read ‘little jimmy sue had his first day of school. he liked it. he ate lunch. the end.’ Me included. It must get exhausting.
Since we were new to school, I was slightly nervous. We are lucky enough to be surrounded by lots of family. Family that could always keep Allie. So school was the first that she had ever been unleashed in the hands of people she was not related to. She did great.
However, I did manage to forget to send Allie with her backpack on her first day. This was apparently an EPIC FAIL. All of the other kid’s mothers remembered to send their backpacks, of course. Aside from mild traumatizing event of having no where to put the tiny piece of candy she had earned that day, Allie was fine. All in all, Allie loved school. She still loves it. Each day she is so excited to pick her clothes out and have me double french braid her curly red hair.
On her first day, she came home with the name of every boy in her class memorized. I’m sure at some point in the near future Adam will buy a cabinet full of guns and start polishing them. She knew only one of the little girls’ names, Rosie. This was only because the girl had what Allie called a “snot mustache”.
“A snot mustache,” I mistakenly questioned when she first brought it up.
“Yes, she had snot all under her nose and all over the top of her mouth. Like a mustache.”
“Were you nice to Rosie,” I asked, worried because in the depths of my mind I was imposing Allie’s adorable face on the body of Regina George on the promo poster for the movie Mean Girls. And I really don’t ever want her to be a Mean Girl. Or someone who thinks they are their own school’s version of the Mean Girls.
“I was nice, Mom. But she did have a mustache.”
“Are you sure you were nice,” I asked. I needed reassurance. Mostly because I’ve always had strange allergies, and I always had a runny nose. But my mom usually sent me to school with pockets full of tissue.
“Yes, I helped her get a kleenex,” Allie replied.
“Did she want a kleenex?”
“NO, but she needed one,” Allie said, honestly.
The conversation sort of drifted off there, because she then started discussing all of the boys in her class: Matthew, Connor, Riley, Brendan, Aaron, Billy, Stephen. And this boy discussion has continued.
So she came home today and was all, “Oh my gosh, mom! If Riley doesn’t start being good, he can’t go to the FIELD TRIP!”
Oh, the drama.
Her first field trip is in October, and it is to an Apple Orchard. She gets to ride a school bus on the trip, and that will likely be the highlight of her upcoming month. I’m not sure how she has managed to portray school buses in such a positive light. I always hated them.
All in all, I could swear I see my life flashing and passing before my very own eyes. Isn’t she is still supposed to be waddling around with an umbilical cord dragging behind her or something? Any day now I’m going to start sprouting gray pubic hairs.
PS. Is wordpress serious about ANOTHER upgrade after I Just upgraded last week. I’d like to eat its soul.
September 9th, 2008 @ 3:30 pm
OMG, hilarious. Especially “She needed one!”
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September 9th, 2008 @ 3:40 pm
LOL. I have just a few things to say:
1. your daughter is awesome.
2. your husband might want to start preparing an assortment of baseball bats and so on for a few years down the road
3. my daughter told me a similar story, except it was about a boy who farted a lot. She was nice, she said, but had to get away for a while until the smell went away, then she went back to play with him.
You have to admit they are both right. They were nice, and snot mustache and farting are not appropriate behavior in a social setting, even when you are in primary school
Elisas last blog post..help! I’m Paris Hilton!
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September 9th, 2008 @ 3:41 pm
Oh the first day of school…I love that story. My daughter is in a class with only two other girls. The class is all boys. So much fun…yesterday she learned the joy of shouting “FART” at the top of her lungs at random times. Fun times at dinner that night. The people in the restaurant probably thought I was a horrible mother.
Merediths last blog post..The Drama of Politics
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September 9th, 2008 @ 4:00 pm
ahhh, the joys of preschool. i remember the mega drama when we accidentally got the wrong kids’ paper. chicken had a meltdown in the car.
Heather~Domestic Extraordinaires last blog post..A note from Liz
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September 9th, 2008 @ 4:21 pm
Ha. I never minded the bus rides. I kind of liked them.
zandors last blog post..I dream of Pleasentville..
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September 9th, 2008 @ 4:27 pm
you are funny. and your daughter is too. great post.
karens last blog post..I Will Miss This Face
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September 9th, 2008 @ 4:31 pm
How funny is she about the boys? My son is the same way with girls. He can name a lot more girls than he can boys and he’s been at this school for a year. Ummm…I guess I better start warning those momma’s to lock their girls up, there’s a studmuffin on the loose!
She’s so cute in that picture!
Natalies last blog post..Into Life
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September 9th, 2008 @ 4:32 pm
Gawd, I love that girl. I’d have handed Rosie a kleenex too!
WMs last blog post..For maximum entertainment stick close to home
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September 9th, 2008 @ 4:58 pm
Hahaha! She needed one!
My oldest is sooo not going to ride the bus. I asked him if he would like to try one day coming home on the bus and he said “no, I’ll have to ride it on field trip day because you’re not allowed to drive me to the field trip.”
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September 9th, 2008 @ 5:17 pm
OMG, this made me laugh out loud. However, should I be concerned? I just belatedly recalled that Sam-my SON-also had all the boys names in kindergarten memorized. Hm. Food for thought. I will ask him tonight while I remove the orange nail polish from his fingers.
Koris last blog post..Riding the Wave-and Failing to Stay Afloat
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September 9th, 2008 @ 5:26 pm
You and your lovely daughter are a trip…snot moustache…sprouting gray pubic hairs -all very funny stuff.
Mollys last blog post..We have guests
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September 9th, 2008 @ 5:41 pm
Don’t upgrade wordpress without lots of moral support nearby. Just sayin.
And I love the “NO, but she needed one,” line.
Rees last blog post..Maid of Honor – Past in Polaroids 5
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September 9th, 2008 @ 5:57 pm
Bah, I do the same thing. I endlessly ask questions to assure myself that my kids aren’t the “naughty” or “mean” kids at school. So far, so good… I think.
Good luck to Allie, she’s such a cutie!
Sam (The Edge Of Insanity)s last blog post..Dear Mr. Google
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September 9th, 2008 @ 6:15 pm
I have no idea why, but this post totally reminds me of when this girl, Faye, peed her pants in the 2nd grade. I am a freak.
Rhis last blog post..Get in Shape Girl
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September 9th, 2008 @ 6:27 pm
she is just too cute. Her little pose is hilarious along with the things she says.
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September 9th, 2008 @ 6:28 pm
“She needed one!!”
Love it!!!
~Brea
Brea in Texass last blog post..The Simple Woman’s Daybook
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September 9th, 2008 @ 6:36 pm
At least she liked it, ya know? My little kindergarten came home declaring his teacher wasn’t very smart. FANTASTIC. Let’s hope he didn’t let her in on his hunch. Gonna be a loooonnnggggggggggggg year.
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September 9th, 2008 @ 6:59 pm
She is so adorable! I remember “the first days of school” with my girls:) Have fun!
Adventure girl wanna bes last blog post..My first serious post-
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September 9th, 2008 @ 7:38 pm
If you start sprouting grey pubes, I’ve got tweezers and I’d be HAPPY to help. I’m just sayin’.
lceels last blog post..An Award and The Aging Man
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September 9th, 2008 @ 7:43 pm
HA…girls are funny like that. My daughter has always came home talking about the boys and well the girls, she’ll befriend one or two but the rest is all boys. Time flies when your having fun!!
~K
Kels last blog post..Materialistic?
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September 9th, 2008 @ 8:14 pm
Completely off topic, but since you mentioned it. I’ve always wondered about when pubic hair grays. You know how on men the beard grays before the head, does the pubic hair go first, too?
That picture is super cute!
Caras last blog post..Wakenings
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September 9th, 2008 @ 8:33 pm
HAHAHA!!! She is hilarious! Because seriously, snot mustaches are gross. Eww. But like you I would have been asking if my boys had been nice a million times too.
Kathryns last blog post..Let’s Make A Deal
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September 9th, 2008 @ 9:29 pm
Keep her away from Riley. He’s bad news.
morethananelectricians last blog post..Whoops!
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September 9th, 2008 @ 10:09 pm
I’m bummed on Wordpress too, but man, I don’t want to eat their soul.
Not to self: Please be nice to Shamelessly Sassy.
Writer Dads last blog post..Her Royal Bloggess
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September 9th, 2008 @ 10:25 pm
hah! My need for a child is growing but for now, I’m content to live vicariously through your hysterical child.
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September 9th, 2008 @ 11:37 pm
Funny!
Now how do you put your website across the pic like that? I want to do that.
lisas last blog post..And So It Begins…
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September 10th, 2008 @ 1:28 am
Wow! Your daughter is adorable. When I was in school, snot mustaches were in fashion, but that may have just been the town I lived in. Come to think of it, it might just have been me. All I know is, no one offered me a tissue.
Please save some of WP’s soul for me. I like me some WP soul with UPGRADE GRAVY. Or, I too have to upgrade.
goodfathers last blog post..Weightloss Dad
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September 10th, 2008 @ 2:47 am
…but she needed one!
I’m dying. I so love that kid.
dysfunctional moms last blog post..Drum Roll Please!
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September 10th, 2008 @ 3:07 am
She is quite lovely, and so sweet to “help” Rosie =)
The Microblogologists last blog post..Guess that Gizmo 9-5-08
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September 10th, 2008 @ 5:37 am
She’s a rock star! And so good mannered too – it was very sweet to help Rosie with the tissue. Kind of like that friend that tells you that your fly is down or that there is spinach in your teeth. Some things just need help!
By the way, can I just point out that she clearly has the super-model pose down ALREADY! Watch out Mama!
calicobebops last blog post..Physically Tough
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September 10th, 2008 @ 7:40 am
“She needed one” That’s sweet.
Uh oh on the whole boy thing. I was informed yesterday that my littlest one has a GIRLFRIEND! She blew him a kiss on the bus yesterday.
Oh Lord, no… not yet.
Eternal Sunshines last blog post..I am The Little Red Hen
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September 10th, 2008 @ 8:18 am
“No, but she needed one.”
That cracks me up.
Michelles last blog post..My ego is swelling
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September 10th, 2008 @ 8:25 am
A great First Day of School Story!! What a pip she is..love her spunk!
markys last blog post..10 on tuesday
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September 10th, 2008 @ 9:02 am
What is it with kids and school buses anyway? Mine thinks they are the bomb diggity, but I distinctly remember having ALWAYS hated them. I wonder if Dora has been sending out subliminal messages on behalf of bus driver’s everywhere.
Burgh Babys last blog post..Big Head, Big Heart
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September 10th, 2008 @ 11:05 am
Awwwwww! She looks SO cute!!!! Not at ALL like a mean girl!
Isn’t that cute that she NEEDED a kleenex? Hee hee!
Logan began Kindergarten on the 25th of August….and he’s so funny about school. They have a “clip” thing where the clip starts out on the bear, and each time you misbehave you go to a green smiley, a blue neutral smiley, a yellow sad face, eventually to a red sad face. Logan, by some miracle has only been placed on the green smiley 2 times since school began. So, he comes home yesterday and says, “Mommy, Samuel got his clip moved to the yellow face and he had to sit in time out.”
“He did? Oh, that’s not so good.”
“Yeah, the green face is okay, the blue face means time out, the yellow face means no play time, and the red face means not so good.”
“huh….how about that. Where was your clip today?”
“On the bear. But mommy, if Samuel gets on the yellow or red face again he can’t Participate in fun day!”
“what’s fun day?” (I swear the parent is the last to know these things.)
“MOMMY! I’m worried about SAMUEL here!”
“Okay okay, sheesh, sorry!”
Aren’t they cute about this stuff????
BTW, Logan LOOOOOVES the school bus. Weirdo.
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September 10th, 2008 @ 11:46 am
I used to LOVE the school bus as a kid. It was a chance to sit in the back (not TOO far, you don’t want to be branded “trouble maker”) and hold little Jimmy’s hand. (Now you’ll really want to pull the guns out.)
E!s last blog post..Obama-rama
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September 10th, 2008 @ 12:13 pm
You know, I could just tell from that picture that she was going to be a handful. All the boys’ names memorized on the first day? Holy cow. My son is still learning his classmates’ names (boys and girls) and he is in his third week of school (in first grade). Amazing.
She’s a cutie though. And, yes, better get that gun safe and polish up those guns! You’re in trouble!
Rheas last blog post..Building blocks; chickens and atoms
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September 10th, 2008 @ 3:52 pm
Molly,
Thank you!
-Amanda
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September 10th, 2008 @ 3:52 pm
e!,
I hope my husband doesn’t read my comments section. If so, he will start following the school bus (haha).
-Amanda
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September 10th, 2008 @ 3:55 pm
Tiffany D,
What are we going to do with these school bus loving weirdos?
-Amanda
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September 10th, 2008 @ 7:18 pm
Gee, you never know. School buses–yecch…Over twenty years since I rode one, and I still have nightmares!
dianeinjapans last blog post..Lotus Ride 2008
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September 10th, 2008 @ 9:45 pm
ahhh…your daughter is funny. i can totally see mine being the exact same when she starts next year. and great 1st day pic. so sassy!
Melissas last blog post..Mint green and my bad mommy moment
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September 10th, 2008 @ 11:57 pm
My husband and I don’t have kids yet, but I cannot wait to be able to experience these moments for myself.
My unrelated childhood story (imagine in a jersey accent): My uncle calls one day when I was around 5:
ME:Hello?
UNCLE: Jacklyn, is your mom there?
ME: NO, she’s at the store.
UNCLE: Is your dad home?
ME: He’s downstairs. (sounds annoyed)
UNCLE: Can you get him?
ME: Gimme a minute. (starts unraveling the phone cord from under the kitchen chair legs)
UNCLE: Jacklyn you there?
ME: Hang on! (sounding upset)
UNCLE: Jacklyn, just have your dad come to the phone.
ME: I said hang on! God-are-ya-deaf!?
Little did we know, the conversation was picked up by the answering machine, and the whole thing was recorded. Unfortunately I hated having to listen to it whenever anyone came over, that I got the tape out and pulled the film out of it.
My mom has told me the story enough times for me to know the dialog.
My related story:
My mother-in-law got a phone call on my husbands first day of first grade, because he did not color. He did not want to color, because he learned how to color in Kindergarten, and he did not feel the need to do things he already learned. He was there to learn new things. LOL!
Jacklyns last blog post..WooHoo for Interviews!
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September 16th, 2008 @ 10:29 pm
I saw that picture over at flickr and could not get over
1. How big she got..
2. How beautiful she is
3. How diva her pose is…
Kims last blog post..Fight The Sag Update..The Good, The Bad and The UGLY
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shamelessly sassy | blog archives | inspiration and first days
August 20th, 2009 @ 8:37 am
[...] slightly weepy after dropping her off; however, I wasn’t a water fountain. I suppose since she was in preschool for a semester last year while I finished my already useless degree, I wasn’t as cry baby [...]