Vacant Uterus: Not Accepting Applications
- June 26th, 2008 2:29 am
Upon hearing about the pregnancy pacts made amongst seventeen teen girls last week, all I could think about was the pregnancy pacts I used to make as a teen. The ones to NOT get pregnant.
Because seriously, the last thing my friends and I were doing was making a pact about changing poopy diapers together while pulling our hair out due to stress and transition. No way was I making a pact to get knocked up. I was busy crossing my fingers about NOT getting knocked up. I kid, I kid. sort of.
Anyway, speaking of babies:
Since Allie turned three, I’ve been frequently asked when and if Adam and I are going to have another baby. And by Adam and I have another baby, I mean that I house that parasitic savage in my body for 9 months after he slips me the goods. Then, I force him to watch me give birth vaginally while he scans CNN for news while hoping to pass out and wake up in time to cut the cord.
BUT the answer to the irksome question is always, ‘I don’t know. I don’t know if we will.’
And that’s the truth.
I don’t know if we really want anymore children, but in the future, that could change. After all, I am a youngster.
Such a response is usually met with the person then telling me that eventually Allie will be too old to have sibling, they’ll be too many years apart, I won’t want children, or some other nonsense bullshit that, to me , is not the basis for having another child.
Maybe this sounds like a harsh reaction, but I have to hear this all regularly in what seems like a repetitive shot at driving me crazy. I get asked this so frequently that it’s as if I am a reproductive system with legs to some of these people.
I feel like they look at me, see a vacant uterus, and get all antsy like that I’m breaking the law or trying to sell them a mason jar full of skin cancer.
To be honest, it took me a little while to get this mother of one child gig going smoothly. I was twenty when I had Allie, and the transition to mom for me was not always easy. I had never even held a baby before. So when she came out of my party barn crying, I wanted simultaneously to coo and hug her, but I was half-busy thinking she would break in half if I did.
Why so much pressure? Geez.
The best (crazy) suggestion I hear is that I should have another child so I can have one of each sex. HELLO? Kids aren’t shirts. I don’t need them in both styles. We’re happy with the one we have. I’m sure the other style is nice, but still.
Besides, if my maternal instincts get all crazy, I’ll just get a puppy or start wearing character t-shirts. After all, we’re content with just the one. For now, anyway.
June 26th, 2008 @ 2:47 am
I agree with you.
You should decide when you are going to have a baby and deciding so means that you really, really, really want to have another one. 
I was also often asked about this by people. When are you gonna have baby #2?
I say, “I don’t know. I honestly don’t.” I don’t need to explain myself why I don’t want it yet. There’s nothing wrong with that. I’m 26 and I am still young.
So enjoy having one. Should we decide to have another is because we really would like to have another one. Yep, babies ain’t shirts. :/
Yvies last blog post..Lunch out
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June 26th, 2008 @ 3:04 am
So, what if the next one were a girl? Then what would you do, trade it in for a boy?
I hate when people try to convince other people to have (or not have) more children. It really irks me. It’s a totally personal decision and IMO there’s nothing wrong with having ONE child. I love all of my kids, but I occasionally think how nice it would be to be able to give ONE child my everything, instead of dividing my time, attention, money, etc. There are definitely perks in each situation.
Both my sister & brother have only one child and their kids are fine and not scarred for life for being a dreaded only child. @@
You do what you wanna do, that’s what I say!
dysfunctional moms last blog post..Cyberstalkers: The Slime on the Web
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June 26th, 2008 @ 3:20 am
Oh babe this made me laugh! I had Moo at 19. Everyone was all ‘ooooh you are too young’ and then when are you having another one. Then Too came along 23 months later and they were all ‘ooooh too close together, when are you gunna try for a BOY!’ and then Boo came along when Moo was SEVEN and they were all ‘ooooh too big an age gap’
And where are ‘they’ now? Eating their freaking words.
Do what feels right babe. When you decide.
Kelleys last blog post..Where is my union rep?
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June 26th, 2008 @ 3:35 am
You know at some point, your body clock is probably going to kick you in the teeth and you will probably decide that you want another.
But whether it happens at all, or in 6 months, or 10 years is really no one’s business but your’s.
Veronicas last blog post..Women and Vibrators
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June 26th, 2008 @ 3:52 am
i cannot say anything more intelligent than ‘dude. i understand. imagine how much more annoying it could be if you had to explain single parentdom as a method of birth control.’
why? cuz i am busy thinking of alternate, but still appropriately contextual sentences in which to use the phrase, ‘party barn.’ can you please make me a dictionary? you know all the rad moves. (kind of like the BACKYARDIGANS!)
Zoeyjanes last blog post..Ruined
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June 26th, 2008 @ 4:49 am
mine is CLOSED and DONE.
although Im not a youngster.
dont listen to me.
Miz.
MizFits last blog post..Guest Chef Time!
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June 26th, 2008 @ 6:07 am
You have lots of time to decide…and you may decide one is enough.
Melissas last blog post..My Baby is Six….
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June 26th, 2008 @ 6:22 am
You can’t ever make people happy.. they ask now..”when are you having another baby???”"”
Then you get pregnant and they comment ” You’re pregnant AGAIN?”
You are wise to not be bullied… There is NOTHING wrong with having one child!~
And if you do decide on another, age shouldn’t be a factor either.. my #2 and #3 are 11 years apart..
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June 26th, 2008 @ 6:58 am
Try answering ‘when are you gonna have #1′ !
Nosey maggots!
Xbox4NappyRashs last blog post..Mind the gap
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June 26th, 2008 @ 8:00 am
People are crazy…CRAZY! When is that ever a good question. We get it ALL THE TIME being that we are in our late 20’s, and nobody seems to think it might be a sore subject…
plus, way to go on having one at 20! I would have flipped out…I am just barely ready at 28. There is no time that she will be to old for a younger sibling, and if she is an only, that is 100% okay too. Just ignore the crazy people…
Sarahs last blog post..Getting (Wii) Fit
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June 26th, 2008 @ 8:19 am
Why is that people have no trouble telling others what to do with their reproductive systems? Back in the day (okay, like 100 years ago), people said delicate things like “in the family way”, but now, it’s perfectly normal for complete strangers to walk up to me and ask whether my twins were conceived “naturally” (ie, Did I have unprotected sex?) or by IVF (ie, Are my husband’s balls or my ovaries broken?). You’ve hit a pet peeve, which I’ve already ranted about at http://rodrigueztwins.blogspot.com/2008/02/dont-catch-me-on-bad-day.html.
It’s none of anyone’s business how many children you have. Or when. Or even how.
Recently, my reaction to people saying “Oh, twins! I guess you’re not having more” is to give a long long explanation of all the things my husband and I have taken into account into our decision not to have more kids. It’s the least I can do to “thank” them for their interest.
Sadias last blog post..Things Parents Say Part II
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June 26th, 2008 @ 8:22 am
People are rude.
I HATE that question of “when will you have another?”. I already have 2, and we probably will have one more, and probably soon. BUT – it is none of their freakin business if I have when I have more!
Rude, rude, rude.
Missys last blog post..What did I Buy?
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June 26th, 2008 @ 8:26 am
you said “party barn” LMAO
i have an almost 3yo son and a 17mo daughter. my mom threatens me with bodily harm if i have any more. WTH? are my parenting skillz that sucky? listen meemaw, i learned it from you alright?!
sorry.
marchelles last blog post..|no boys allowed|
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June 26th, 2008 @ 8:32 am
It often amazes me (in a mouth hanging open & drool dangling from lower lip kinda way) the things that come from people’s mouths….the things that people think it’s OK to say.
Girl, you’ve got many years to consider it. You’re so young (and I don’t mean that in a condiscending or patronizing way) Hell, think about it, you could wait another 20 years and decide to have another. I have a brother who is 3 years younger than me and another brother who is 14 years younger than me…and I’m equally close to both.
OR you can decide to NOT have another and have a child moving out in another 15-20 years…and then you’ll take a new lease out on life because you’ll have freedom from a dependent child. Both situations rock in my book. You can’t lose…no matter what you decide to do.
Tammys last blog post..Little Miss Dance’n Diva
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June 26th, 2008 @ 8:36 am
I think Annie said it best when, after the second son was born, and one of her sisters asked her when she was going to have the next one, she said, “Fuck you and the horse you rode in on.”
Zachary was born seven years later. He was a surprise. A great and pleasant surprise, but a surprise nonetheless.
It’s only between you and your husband. And come right down to it, it’s really up to you. It is, after all, your body that has to bear the child. And in our society, it’s your body that must give succor to the child.
So when they all ask, tell ‘em what to do with their horse.
lceels last blog post..31 times 365 plus 7
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June 26th, 2008 @ 8:48 am
If you do decide someday that you want another, there is no magic age where your first is too old to add a second. My kids are 5 and a half years apart and when I was pregnant with my girl people would always so “Oh, they’re going to be too far apart in age, they’ll never get along!” That is stupid. No, my kids can’t do everything together but they still love each other like crazy and get along like best friends.
So, to sum up: There is no magic age, one is awesome (so are two) and people are stupid.
Jens last blog post..The Story of Joseph – Changing Strategy
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June 26th, 2008 @ 8:49 am
We have two girls and I always get comments about trying for a boy. I just tell them at this point, my house is too girled. So purple and dress-up and baby dolls, I don’t have enough square footage to add GI Joes and train tables. But I have a friend who chooses to be childless who has the best line: in the face of a question like that, she growls ‘get your hands off my ovaries,’ and spins and walks away.
NESs last blog post..Tides
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June 26th, 2008 @ 8:56 am
It’s been coming out in the past few days that the pregnancy pact never actually existed, that in fact the girls who were already pregnant promised to support each other and help each other out. the pregnancy pact concept came from the principal who pretty much made it up and seems like a real douche.
anyway, I get asked about when I’m going to have another often enough. I’m always baffled by that question and have a mixture of two reactions: 1) whoa, that is NONE of your business; this is MY uterus and sex with MY husband that we’re talking about here so BACK OFF and 2) wow, are you high? do you see what a shit job I’m doing with the one that I have?
kdiddys last blog post..tell you what, wal-mart
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June 26th, 2008 @ 9:12 am
The hardest transition for me was that first child too. It was such a slap in the face. Huge reality check.
People are too nosy. We should think up a super sassy way of replying to them. LOL!
OHmommys last blog post..I just want them to act normal for 10 days.
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June 26th, 2008 @ 9:24 am
I get this question a lot, and actually had a waitress at IHOP tell me she just knows i’ll have another baby soon because Zoey is so “advanced”, she’s making room for another. Uh, no. Not pregnant, not planning to become pregnant. Have two, one of each sex and I am happy with them and would be if I had two boys, two girls, two whatevers.
I think it should be socially unacceptable to mention the word “pregnancy” in front of any mother.
alynns last blog post..Our ‘Thang’
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June 26th, 2008 @ 9:27 am
Mine oldest two-a girl and a boy-are 16 months apart. Then there is a 6 and 5 (respectively) year age gap between them and my third child. And now I have a 15 year old, a 14 year old, a 9 year old, and a 2 year old. The question I get is, “Don’t you know what causes that?” as if I have somehow contracted some horrible disease that could have been prevented. People are just nosy bastards and you have to make the decisions that are best for YOU.
Koris last blog post..The Evil TV
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June 26th, 2008 @ 9:30 am
Drip. Drip. Drip. It’s the old Chinese Water Torture trick. They keep asking. Drip. Drip. Drip.
DUDE, we do NOT do that anymore! These girls are trying to kill me KILL ME! I can not increase their ranks by having more! What the HELL is wrong with you?! My vajayjay is none of your business!
Sometimes I think I should switch to decaf.
carolyns last blog post..The Teddy Chronicles: the Doppelganger.
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June 26th, 2008 @ 9:37 am
If it makes you feel better, my son is only two weeks old and people are already giving me advice. On one hand, they don’t want me to fall into the trap and get pregnant again right away, but they don’t want me to wait too long to get him a little brother or sister either. SIGH. Right now, I can’t even imagine ever giving birth again, so I really wish people would lay off the unsolicited advice!
Cassies last blog post..Mediocrity at its best
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June 26th, 2008 @ 9:41 am
don’t pay attention to the pressure..it’s ridiculous. you are young. if and when you want another…you will do it.
alis last blog post..18A 4RE and other such idiocy
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June 26th, 2008 @ 9:59 am
have you considered ducks?
Audubon Rons last blog post..Angel Part 3
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June 26th, 2008 @ 10:01 am
As I get closer to 40 and my one and only just turned 11, those types of questions stopped eons ago. But I remember all to well being badgered about it when we were trying for our one and only. It was so frustrating. Now when I bring up the subject of still wanting another baby, I get comments like, WTF! Why would you want to start all over? Stuff like that. It just blows my mind that people think they have the right to tell you when and how many kids you have. Anyway, whether you stop at one or have another, it’s between you and your hubby. Fuck everyone else.
Susans last blog post..Finally, Chicago trip details, and one other thing
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June 26th, 2008 @ 10:03 am
Relax. Ignore the questions. If you are ever ready, you’ll know. My SIL had her two kids a decade apart. Those girls are the closest of friends. Whatever you choose will work just fine
Cautions last blog post..A Must Read: The Shipping News
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June 26th, 2008 @ 10:21 am
My daughter is about to turn 3 too. I get asked almost daily by family, friends, or perfect strangers when we are having #2. I am an only child- and in my opinion, it wasn’t that bad. Whenever we took a family vacation, I got to bring a friend. I had Friday night sleepovers almost every Friday night… I mean, c’mon, I had a revolving door of friends. Something that might not have been possible if I had a Sister or Brother. I do wonder what kind of cuteness we would create the second time around- but for now- I’m okay just wondering.
kalyns last blog post..ABC… easy as 123
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June 26th, 2008 @ 10:56 am
My three girls are all about 5 years apart…. for a couple reasons. Number one- I was in no hurry to duplicate the experience. Number two… I really had to get to the point where I yearned for the soft head and the smell and feel of a little body next to mine. I had to be ready to dedicate the next two years to pregnancy and nursing. As I watched my oldest two leave babyhood and toddlerhood, it was easier to determine if I wanted that again. And frankly my oldest and my youngest did quite well together at 9 years apart. I wouldn’t worry about spacing, it’s hardly a reason to rush. You’ll know if and when you’re ready to do it again!
Asthmagirls last blog post..Oh Honestly!
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June 26th, 2008 @ 11:11 am
WHEE! You’re my new best one kid friend.
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June 26th, 2008 @ 11:16 am
It really is amazing how people ‘cross the line’ by asking intrusive questions that aren’t any of their beeswax ( I love to say Beeswax for some reason…. Beeswax!)
When I was preggers with my 5th, people assumed, mistakenly, that the reason I was having another child was that I was “trying for a girl”, because I had 4 boys already…
WOW! Folks sure can be stupid!
I mean, what kind of idiot keeps ‘trying’ to have a son or daughter by having more and more kids…
Ah…. no offense to any of you who did that…. I’m sure that YOU had “other”, non-idiotic reasons too….
SS – you have a beautiful daughter and if and when you have another child is your business and yours alone…
But if you do…
What do you think of the names Jackie for a girl or Jack for a boy?
Just wondering!
Jackie
Jackies last blog post..The Good, the Bad & the Sweaty…
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June 26th, 2008 @ 11:34 am
Just so you know, it wouldn’t stop anyway. Here we are with FOUR boys, and some idiot is always asking “Don’t you want to try for a girl?”
At which point I go to jail for attempted murder.
Honeybells last blog post..Sorrowful
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June 26th, 2008 @ 11:40 am
hear hear lady!
Colleen – Mommy Always Winss last blog post..Random Rambles
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June 26th, 2008 @ 12:09 pm
I vote for character t shirts…they don’t poop all over the place!!
I had people asking me moments after pushing out my premature child if we were going to have another! Um, I’d just like to make sure this one makes it ok! Thanks so much!
Alisons last blog post..My Heart is Full, too
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June 26th, 2008 @ 12:18 pm
Party barn. Still my favorite word you have ever written.. I am terrible.
And it is no one else’s business if you should have anymore kids or not..
Ugh. that just urks me.
and the fact that I am really old.
Kims last blog post..Adventures In Bra Hunting
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June 26th, 2008 @ 12:37 pm
Ugh! I feel your pain on this one!! I have blogged about it before.
WHY does it matter? I have one isn’t that enough? He’s happy and healthy and I am just able to see my ass again and be happy with it.
I love the response, “If you don’t hurry up the new baby will be hard for #1 kid.” Oh yes please let me go right out and get pregnant now.
I think I may start telling people that while I would love to have another that my dear hubby just can’t get it up anymore but I am taking donations.
Maybe that will work.
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June 26th, 2008 @ 12:43 pm
I find it incredibly rude and obnoxious when people ask these types of questions. It’s way up there with “when do you want to start having kids” which is asked literally at your wedding reception. I swear it never ends. When you’re dating it’s “When are you getting married,” when you get married it’s, “When are you having your first baby” and when you have one baby, it’s “When is the second one coming?” I think people are just trying to make conversation … but whatever happened to asking about the weather? Boring? Yes. But inoffensive.
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June 26th, 2008 @ 1:49 pm
I have the same problem and it’s more than annoying. You would think in this day and age with so many people having problems conceiving that others would watch what they say.
Helens last blog post..BBQ Tip #1…and #2
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June 26th, 2008 @ 2:02 pm
People constantly asked us when were having another child when Ethan was only around 5-6 months old. I hated having to tell people it was none of their business, but it really is nobody’s business on whether you want one child or thirteen. And if they pull the gender card simply remind them you cannot pick and choose what the gender of your next would be. As my grandmother says “why waste a good sperm trying for something you cannot guarantee?” And yes, my grandmother is insane.
Jessicas last blog post..Gotta love it..
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June 26th, 2008 @ 2:19 pm
Oh hell…ditto. DITTO to it all. We are in the same boat. However, I’m a bit older….and apparently, as I am told, my “eggs are starting to run short on supply.”
Sandy (Momisodes)s last blog post..Why Are People So Strange?
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June 26th, 2008 @ 2:33 pm
Some people have NO class. We need to think of a witty comeback to put them in their place! What that would be, I have no idea!
Jennifers last blog post..Unhappy Birthday
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June 26th, 2008 @ 2:57 pm
Our second was an “oops” baby, so I never had a choice but to have two. We didn’t even get the chance to have the “when’s the next one coming” questions.
A Whole Lot of Nothings last blog post..T13: Enter if You Dare
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June 26th, 2008 @ 3:10 pm
It’s a cult. First they want you married, then barefoot and pregnant. Before you know your president of the PTA, Rotary, and meals on wheels. You haven’t seen your husband in two weeks. Your kids are in soccer, karate, and spanish classes. Or maybe that is just SoCal.
Run away when those people talk to you.
Lisas last blog post..I am too tired for stories
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June 26th, 2008 @ 3:21 pm
Ahh! You did it. And, well done, Amanda. You know how I feel about this dicey subject.
Anglophile Football Fanatics last blog post..Holy COW!
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June 26th, 2008 @ 3:24 pm
I was pretty fertile and got pregnant the first time back in the saddle after I had my first. I never gave anyone a chance to ask that question.
But when the third came along, people started asking if I had enough yet! So you could imagine the comments when I had the fourth.
You can’t win with nosy folks like that; it’s definitely better just to what is right for you.
Kels last blog post..Window to my soul
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June 26th, 2008 @ 4:03 pm
oh girl, you never cease to make me laugh, even when it’s serious. I mean “party barn”. Holy crap that is hilarious.
Anyway, I get ya so hard I can’t even tell ya. But I get “so when are you two gonna have kids? I mean we are all having a litter and misery loves company so why don’t you join us?” and “you know he’s not getting any younger and neither are you or your eggs, just saying”. UGH.
Mrs. Kittys last blog post..Our Harbor of Hope
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June 26th, 2008 @ 5:02 pm
I think you should come up with smart comments like Jennifer suggests.
How about “Oh, Adam and I stopped having sex” or “Allie was an immaculate conception and I’m not ready to lose my virginity just yet” or “When you buy me a bigger house!” or “I’m waiting to find out how Allie turns out”.
Think of something that will knock people back!
Otherwise – ignore it. Your business, not theirs.
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June 26th, 2008 @ 6:00 pm
We really really considered only having one. We ended up having a second and they are a little over three years apart. Sometimes I think maybe four or six years apart would have been better, but anyhoo, my point is that ultimately the decision is yours and your hubbys (not that you didn’t already know that) and *if* you decide to have another you will do it in your time.
KD @ A Bit Squirrellys last blog post..Seriously the SMOKIN’-EST Hiker EVAH (SFMTY)
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June 26th, 2008 @ 6:17 pm
Came out of your party barn?! Omg, you’re killin’ me here. I’m laughing so hard I need to pee. A vacant uterus? Character shirts?! Oh my gosh.
You’re freakin’ hilarious.
Rheas last blog post..Swimming
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June 26th, 2008 @ 6:32 pm
It’s nobody’s business! I hate when people get all weird when they don’t get the answer they want to hear.
I love all the suggestions for answering them back. And I love that you called “it” a party barn! Hilarious!
Mrs. Schmittys last blog post..Superballs And Bouncy Balls
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June 26th, 2008 @ 9:34 pm
My kids are almost four years apart and we got the same dumb questions. We just told everyone that we didn’t even know where the first one came from, how could we have any idea where the second would.
Tara R.s last blog post..Facing the demon
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June 26th, 2008 @ 9:45 pm
Whoever said they’ll be to far a part in age is a moron. I’m 5 years older than my sister (my brother is exactly in the middle of us)… my mom is nine years older than her youngest brother (she’s one of 12 though lol).
I LOLed at comparing kids to t-shirts.
Mandis last blog post..So Blah…
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June 26th, 2008 @ 9:51 pm
No one ever asked me that, but then they just kept coming so no one had time.
You’ve got the right attitiude–it’s what and when you decide is best for your family.
Jenn @ Juggling Lifes last blog post..A Must Read For . . . Everyone Who Has Or Works With Kids
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June 26th, 2008 @ 10:51 pm
It never ends. Once I popped out #2, people were all, “Are you having another?” Don’t worry about it – people have opinions about the dumbest shit.
Oh and that preggo pact? Those girls are insane!
andis last blog post..Be careful what you wish for
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June 26th, 2008 @ 11:26 pm
My girl is about to turn 3 as well, and for at least the last year, every one keeps asking when we are having another. And honestly? I just got the baby bug about 4 months ago. Before then, I have been too overwhelmed trying to figure out to juggle being a mom and BEING JUST MYSELF, to think about adding another one to the mix. Actually, I am still trying to figure out how to do that.
Do it if and when you are ready. You have the right way of thinking.
Danielle-Lees last blog post..Well, isn’t that special???
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June 27th, 2008 @ 6:12 am
My alltime favorite is when people act like having additional children is somehow a comfort should ‘’something happen” to an only child. Because yeah. That’s how it works, lose a child – no worries long as you have extras laying around. WTF?
Also the title of this post is somewhat funny to me – One of my favorite blogs is called Vacant Uterus (she’s struggled with infertility) and she JUST adopted a baby!
charmingdrivers last blog post..Oh and ALSO
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June 27th, 2008 @ 6:27 am
People tell us we should try for a girl.
I wants to ask….Are you willing to pay for her college?
Queen of Shake Shakes last blog post..Without Further Ado, My First Haiku
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June 27th, 2008 @ 7:38 am
UGH!!! I was 23 when I was pregnant with Logan. I heard “you’re too young” (WTF?) all the time. Then when Kylee came 11 months later, they were all, “Don’t you know what causes that yet?” (Dumbass) So now I have the one boy and one girl…..and Hubby and I were thinking of another one, and all I heard was “OH NO! You don’t NEED more….you already have one of each…….” (Blah blah blah) Then, when hubby and I decided that we really didn’t want anymore, they were all, “Why not? Come on…have another baby! You know you want one….” (WTF again)
There is no pleasing anyone. Stand your ground….it’s your decision…and it’s your money that will be paying for said baby…unless they want to jump in and start helping…they should mind their own business.
P.S. If I ever become a famous author, which I doubt, and I use the word “party barn” in that context…please see the acknowledgements page for your name. LOL Now to start thinking of as many ways to use that as I can! *ponders*
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June 27th, 2008 @ 7:59 am
puppies are cheaper anyway!
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June 27th, 2008 @ 11:15 am
To each their own. I went through that too; we were satisfied with one and am still to this day. For years I was nagged with “Only one? How could you be so cruel as not to give her siblings?” “She’ll be so lonely!” and all that crap.
She has more friends than I can keep track of. She is NEVER lonely.
And we are closer than most parents and kids are. She’s 17 and I am so grateful to be blessed with a wonderful kid. I never regretted our parenting decision.
And neither should you. So ignore them.
Maureens last blog post..Letting My Imagination Run Away
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June 27th, 2008 @ 11:16 am
I have six. 6. 1,2,3,4,5,6 kids. I am still asked when I’m going to have another one! I’ve even heard, “Please have another one! I want one to hold and yours are so pretty.” HELLO! Gracious! Have your own! Of course, I’ve also heard from the others who think I have too many…that I shouldn’t have so many (no returns, sorry). I swear people can’t help themselves. If you’re happy, you’re happy and they should deal with it. @@ Seriously.
Renes last blog post..About Serena
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June 27th, 2008 @ 11:51 am
My fav one liner when asked the same question is ‘Hell, we’re not even sure we are keeping these two!’
I feel ya, though. I love the “HELLO? Kids aren’t shirts. I don’t need them in both styles”
Ultimately, we didn’t want Missy B alone when/should something happen to us. That’s how we got 2 27 months apart.
TRACIs last blog post..shut your gob and spin.
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June 27th, 2008 @ 12:00 pm
Every person should have children as it best suits them! Not anyone else.
Sheesh… peeps think I’m wacked for having five.
I remember after baby #2 (my first two were 20 months apart by design), my favorite person in the world sat there and told me in very straight terms that I did NOT need nor should I have another child. Um, Hello… its my damn uterus and my damn life!
Honestly, I want more. I’m one of those woman who would probably keep having them until someone stopped me! (Okay, maybe I’m not as extreme as Michelle Duggar) Hubby says NO way, NO how.
Just tell the crazies to keep their “appropriate use of gestational abilities” off your life.
Some peeps should have no kids, others should have one or two, some like me think half a dozen is a good number… and others, well they go for a whole city. What works here, doesn’t work everywhere.
Love your title btw.
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June 27th, 2008 @ 2:31 pm
I never understood why other people would be worried about how many kids I was having.
And wanting one of each is NO reason to make a person.
Sarah, Goon Squad Sarahs last blog post..Consider Me Stimulated
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June 27th, 2008 @ 2:56 pm
PARTY BARN??? lol omg I am totally peeing my pants right now.
Ignore the Baby Pushers. There is NO RULE that says siblings need to be less than 3 years apart. Or worse, less than 2 years apart (LORD HELP ME.)
Jens last blog post..hoping for a vomit-free evening
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June 27th, 2008 @ 3:24 pm
I never wanted kids. As a matter of fact I hated kids and feared babies. I had never held, changed, or even played with a baby before. Then, I got knocked up while on the pill. While preggers with kid #1, I hated it. I hated every minute of being preggers and swore she’d be an only child. Three months after her birth, I was preggers with kid #2. I cried during my entire pregnancy thinking kid #2 was just a big mistake. Hell, I cried during the first 3 months after kid #2 was born too. I was overwhelmed. I was scared. But now, I’m so happy that I have two girls that are so close in age. They are so attached to one another and love one another so much. And had I not gotten preggers with #2 by accident, then #1 would be an only child. And I would have to play with Dora figurines and My Little Ponies alot more than I do now. The point of this long ass story? Although I didn’t think I was or ever would be ready for #2, I really was. Food for thought.
LunaNiks last blog post..Lakshmi
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June 27th, 2008 @ 3:44 pm
I do not understand why people are unable to see that the best way for me is not necessarily the best way for others. And God, if someone tells me one more time that my family is “perfect” because I have a boy and a girl I will do something illegal. I had another baby because I wanted A BABY. NOT because I wanted a BOY specifically. (Although he is ever so charming, if I do say so myself.
) Stick to your guns, girl!
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June 27th, 2008 @ 3:45 pm
Oh and I am totally going to start using the term “party barn” now! LOL!
Shannons last blog post..i’m the one who suffers in the end
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June 27th, 2008 @ 4:47 pm
i live two towns south of Pregnancy Pact-ville. on recent journey out of state, i was interviewed by one and all on said Pact. AS IF I KNOW. But I am now thinking of wearing a placard that reads, “Teenagers In OUR Town Only Make Pacts to Share Beer and Weed.”
Darcys last blog post..Me + David Sedaris
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June 27th, 2008 @ 6:37 pm
Woo hoo . . . 70
Kids aren’t shirts. Classic. I get it all the time. I swear he was still pink and gooey and people were asking me.
I started saying stuff like,
“We have a baby on order from China . . . ”
“My uterus fell out when he did.”
“I would, but the clinic hasn’t paid me for J, yet.”
“As soon as my pole dancing days are over.” OR “Once I get that centerfold in Playboy, I’m all over it.”
“My eggs have since packed up and left home.”
It actually doesn’t matter. People ask no matter what.
Oh, and there are 7, 9 and 11 years age difference between my siblings and me. We are closer than any siblings I know . . .
LaskiGals last blog post..PhotoStory Friday: What I wish for you
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June 27th, 2008 @ 8:49 pm
I had a tubal. I wasn’t fuckin’ around.
Marias last blog post..200 lbs, yes.
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June 27th, 2008 @ 11:20 pm
I wished I had the power to decide whether I want another baby or not. Damn! You are so much luckier….I am lucky too in a way that I got the ‘formula’ of producing boys, so I’m happy with my 2 boys now…so even if I don’t have the 3rd one….I guess I’m fine….
Angelines last blog post..Did I kill you?
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June 28th, 2008 @ 6:18 am
I have birthed 6 kids and I have seven living in my house. Last birth, my uterus packed up shop but still the people ask, if we will have more. Even the doctors who know my history ask.
Hello????? You’re the ones who tied my tubes, you should know.
Anyway, you gotta do what’s right for you.
If I had my way I SO go again.
tiffs last blog post..Three day blues…
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June 28th, 2008 @ 8:13 pm
I don’t understand why people think you “have” to have two kids either. Josh wants to have two, but so they’ll both always have someone there for them, someone to play with. I’d probably be busy enough with one, too. But with our genetics and luck, I’ll have twins the first time around, so there’s no need to debate it.
Michelles last blog post..My new second family
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June 30th, 2008 @ 12:32 am
I would like to try my hand at having one… but the time is not right apparently because it is just not happening right now.
Do what you want, that is my theory! Have more if you want, if not who cares? Having only one is perfectly fine, maybe it is best that way. Tell em to shut it and keep those opinions to themselves, it is not their vagina it is yours!
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July 1st, 2008 @ 6:21 am
The pressure just never ends. My hub and I have been married for 5 years and have no kids–the pressure is insane. But, hey, having a kid to make someone else happy would be even more crazy. Just hang in there and make your own decisions.
Thanks for stopping by my blog–nice to have a new commenter!
Taratorys last blog post..Wisdom
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July 1st, 2008 @ 1:49 pm
I had my daughter at 22. And I didn’t really want any more (at that time). I got the same questions and I just started telling people I was waiting at least until she was 10. And I was serious.
Got divorced. Got remarried. Had a son when she was 13 and another son when she was 17.
Spacing? Whatev. She loves her brothers and it is what it is.
Amy @ Milk Breath & Margaritass last blog post..At Sea
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July 2nd, 2008 @ 3:19 am
Wow this post brought back memories…
One child is bliss…Two is CHAOS!
One, you can travel with, alone. No need to pack the house to go anywhere. Needs are easily met and dealt with quickly.
I didn’t play with dolls when I was a kid.
I always planned to adopt, if forced to do the get married have kids thing.
Pressure…? TONS. Thanks to my mom. “By the time I was your age, I had 2 kids and blah blah blah…” Never stopped. She’d feed me shit sandwiches full of guilt. She’d broadcast to anyone who would listen “I’ve got a smart, talented, beautiful daughter, who’s still not married…” She’d shamelessly do this even in FRONT of me to single men, business clients, strangers on the street…
So…I caved, just to shut her up really.
Got married to the worst possible man on the planet. Had baby #1, then a year later upon his decision mid-stroke he announced “I want another baby”.
He got him.
I have him.
And he is the absolute best person without a doubt in my life. He’s 10 now. I can’t bear to ever think that I didn’t want him, because I didn’t. Now? I can’t live without him.
Lessons learned, don’t trust anyone with your uterus. Stop listening to other people’s bullshit (especially your mother’s when you’re over 25) and Sometimes, decisions made for you by God really ARE better than you expect!
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July 3rd, 2008 @ 4:26 pm
oh man. People have all kinds of opinions – I just wish they had boundaries to go with them!!
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July 4th, 2008 @ 1:12 pm
Gosh, I haven’t been here in aaages — and I miss reading your posts!
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