Where Have All the Assholes Gone?
- November 27th, 2007 7:09 pm
Generally, I’m the type of person that casually plans their day. I don’t get all natzi-licious on myself if I stray from the plan. If the time increments don’t fit, or a thing or two gets tossed out of the plans, I can deal with it. But I do like to have the plan. It’s nice to know what’s going on and such.
Anyhow, yesterday, when I fell asleep around 8:00 while laying down with Allie, I was sort of pissed when I woke up at 11:00 p.m and discovered I’d been snoring away. Probably, I should be thrilled that I managed to steal a few extra hours of sleep. But no. The hours from 8-12 are usually the only hours of the day that truly belong to only me. They are mine. Just mine. It’s when I study, when I read, or if I choose, when I watch endless hours of television. Regardless, when I fall asleep early, I sort of feel like I’ve been cheated out of my hours.
Particularly when I need those hours to study like I did last night. Grrr.
While expressing my aggravation with my body shutting down, it would also be a good time to further discuss my hatred for my cable company,every employee within their company along with all of their relatives. First of all, I hate their lack of communication between various branches. I hate that they give me time frames between 8 a.m.-5 p.m, AND THEN, fail to show up between those hours when I make time to have myself there.
Seriously, it’s something every month with them. Either my box breaks or the tv guide quits working, I am so so so so so sick of it.
You know, I bet every asshole kid that went to elementary school is a cable person now. The bullies, the kids who picked on challenged children, the compulsive liars, etc. All of those kids, that even a sweet old lady would hate, have grown up to work in the cable industry. Now, they get paid to lie to you and paid to be truant. It’s a pretty sweet deal for them.
That is officially where all the assholes have gone. The cable company. It’s like the big asshole haven in the sky.
PS. You can totally sing, “Where Have All The Assholes Gone?” to the tune of Paula Cole’s “Where Have All the Cowboy’s Gone”. Try it. I dare you.
PS II. I hope none of you are cable workers. If you are, GET TO MY HOUSE..PRONTO!
November 27th, 2007 @ 11:18 pm
Amen! Waiting around for the cable personnel is ridiculous…If Sears can give a 2-3 hour window during the day to deliver thousands of dollars worth of appliances, the dude riding the cable truck with 1 wire should be able to do it too.
Hope it gets fixed for you soon.
November 27th, 2007 @ 11:39 pm
What? I actually love waiting around my house all day with my stir crazy children, just to have the cable dipshit actually not show up at all. What? No, I’m not bitter at all.
November 28th, 2007 @ 9:10 pm
Most brilliant theory. Ever. I wouldn’t have thought of that!