The Toddler Stiff Leg
- July 18th, 2007 10:26 pm
Anyone with a toddler has probably experienced what I like to call the “Toddler Stiff Leg”. You know, when you’re trying to convince your toddler to put their pants on and they refuse; you then decide to put them on yourself and as you attempt to put their legs in the pant holes they stiff leg you. Their legs are straight as a board, and well, they mean business.
You then have to hold the toddler up off the ground with enough distance between the toddler’s feet and the ground to fit the pants and somehow slide them over the stiff legs.
Allie gave me the toddler stiff leg at least twice today. It’s hell on earth for several reasons.
1.) I’m not that tall: So, holding up a toddler while simultaneously sliding on pants is just hard.
2.) My arms aren’t that long which also makes the task difficult.
3.) I really don’t have a third thing. Probably, I shouldn’t have made a list. Oh well.
At some point, I did have a third item. However, my computer apparently has a mild form of Tourrette’s Syndrome and keeps randomly prompting me about restarting my computer to install updates. Seriously. It’s every five minutes. If I wanted to restart, I would. Get off my back, Windows. You’re like a jealous boyfriend. We’re finished.
PS. Some guy on Dateline NBC’s To Catch a Predator just offered the host and the police the pizza that he brought the 14 year old girl he thought he was going to have sex with in lieu of going to jail. Are you serious?
July 19th, 2007 @ 9:36 pm
Well, I don’t have a toddler obviously (since I borrow Allie for all those cute toddler stories) but I do have Jaden who used to be one and I used to babysit a lot. I know what you’re talking about in the stiff leg thing, and toddlers are stronger than they look. They can be hardcore about not putting pants on.
And I’m sorry about your “jealous boyfriend”, nobody likes that.